Monthly Archives: August 2011

At Oceana, women not wearing bikinis are kicked out?!

Last summer, my husband and I who live in France went to Lebanon to visit family. While there, we decided to go to Oceana to enjoy the sunshine and cool water. I wore a two piece suit that included a tankini top and what they refer to as “shorty” or bottoms that don’t show your thighs.

A lifeguard approached me and told me to get up so he could see what I was wearing. I obliged and came up to the surface of the water. He told me I have to wear a swimsuit or get out.

I told him this is a swimsuit. He said “no”, it has to be a bikini top and a panty with laces on the side. So I flipped and told him why should I wear a bikini? He wasn’t wearing one.

So he got upset and said “I’m a man, I can’t wear a panty”. So I said “OK, so because I’m a girl, I should obliged your eyes so you can see my ass, but you don’t want to show yours”? He got upset because I started making a scene. He said, I have to get out because he didn’t consider what I was wearing to be a bikini.

So I asked him for the rules of the swimming club that pointed out that all females had to be in bikinis. He said I should go and speak to the manager if I had a problem, because he didn’t set the rules. So I told him that if the manager had a problem with my attire, then he should come and tell me himself. Furthermore, if he does have a problem, then my family and I are leaving and would like a refund.

Not only do they charge us horrendously four using the pool and God given beach, but they also want their female customers dressed in bikinis for the pleasure of their eyes. So he insisted on being stubborn and asked me to leave.

Then my husband interefered in English or French because he isn’t Lebanese. The lifeguard said he didn’t speak anything but arabic. Eventually, he agreed to go away.

On our way home, we stopped by the entrance to check the rules and found no mention of “bikinis”.

Life guards in Lebanon should be trained to prioritise safety NOT check out girls! Shame on Oceana!

Submitted by Anonymous

Location: Oceana Beach Club, Jiyyeh

Time of harassment:  16-20: Afternoon Rush Hour / العصر

Do you have a personal experience with sexual harassment or assault you would like to share? Please click here and fill out the online submission form. All submissions are posted anonymously unless you specify.

هل لديك تجربة شخصية مع التحرش الجنسي أو الاعتداء تريد مشاركته ؟ الرجاء الضغط هنا وملء استمارة التقديم على الانترنت. وتنشر جميع التقارير مجهول ما لم تحدد

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A Message from the Team – رسالة من فريق العمل

الرسالة موجودة في اللغة العربية تحت

Hey all,

We wanted to let you know a little about some of the work behind the scenes and how everything’s going! Qaweme Harassment has just reached it’s 11,000th hit and in the last few months a number of stories have been written about the site and the work it’s doing breaking the taboo of silence around sexual harassment in Lebanon.

You can see us on Al Jazeera here.

As well as an article about us in the Daily Star here.

We’re extremely grateful for all the women and men who have spoken up since we started back in April and have demanded their voices be heard and their stories listened to. Qaweme Harassment has become a forum for victims of sexual harassment to fight back, share strategies on resisting harassment, as well as vent, and we’re looking forward to continuing the struggle.

So how can you help Qaweme Harassment?

First off – SPREAD THE WORD! We want as many stories to be heard and as many voices listened to as possible, so please, if you have a personal story you’ve been holding in, write us by clicking HERE and share your feelings and thoughts with the world. The world is listening, so make your rage be heard!

Second- join the Adventures of Salwa! A of S meets every week on Tuesdays at 6 PM at the Nasawiya House in Achrafieh to discuss ongoing campaigns they have related to the issue of sexual harassment in Lebanon- submit your info here for more details!

Third- join Nasawiya! Nasawiya is a feminist collective that works on a wide variety of issues- from improving women’s access to technology to domestic worker rights and everything in between!

Fourth- If you have any connections to AUB, please see what can be done about cases like this of a woman whose young daughter was molested on campus and whose pleas for help were met by SERIOUSLY wrong victim-blaming attitudes on the part of the security staff- which is PAID to protect people on campus. Unlike many cases of sexual harassment we post here, this happened at a university that we can pressure to take action to train its staff on dealing with the issues raised. If you are an AUB student, please start organizing and raising a fuss!

If you have any questions or comments or just wanna talk to one of us, please contact us here!

In Solidarity,

The Qaweme Harassment Team

تحية طيبة،

كان بودنا اعلامكم عن بعض تفاصيل كيفية إجراء العمل، ما وراء المعروض في هذا الموقع! لقد بلغ عدد مشاهدي هذا الموقع 11000 مشاهد، و في بضعة الشهور الأخيرة، قد تمت الكتابة عن الموقع و على مدى تأثير العمل الذي يؤديه في كسر الصمت و التحفظ حول موضوع التحرش الجنسي في لبنان.

بإمكانكم مشاهدتنا على قناة الجزيرة هنا

كذلك قراءة مقال عنا في صحيفة هنا

اننا نتوجه بمنتهى الشكر لكل النساء و الرجال الذين قدموا ما لديهم من روايات، من حيث بدأنا في نيسان/آفريل، طالبين بذلك سماع اصواتهم المناضلة. إن موقع قاومي التحرش أصبح منبراً لضحايا هذا الجرم، يحاربون من خلاله، و يكشفون عن طرق لمقاومة التحرش الجنسي؛ و اننا متعهدين بإكمال هذا النضال.

كيف يمكنكم مساعدة قاومي التحرش:

أولاً: نشر الخبر هنا! نريد إيصال أكبر عدد ممكن من الروايات و الأصوات المناضلة كي نفرض سماعها. فنرجو منكم الإفصاح عن أية رواية شخصية و مشاركة أفكاركم و مشاعركم مع العالم. إن العالم بأجمعه يستمع، فاصرخوا و اكشفوا عن غضبكم!

ثانياً: انضموا إلى مغامرات سلوى! لمغامرات سلوى إجتماع أسبوعي كل ثلاثاء في ال6 بعض الظهر ببيت نسوية في الاشرفيه لمناقشة حملاتهم المتعلقة بمسألة التحرش الجنسي في لبنان- ارسلوا معلوماتكم هنا للمزيد من التفاصيل!

ثالثاً: انضموا إلى نسوية! نسوية فريق نسوي يعمل على الكثير من المسائل بدءًا بتحسين و تطوير إنفتاح النساء على التكنولوجيا حتى موضوع حقوق عملات المنازل، و كل ما يلي بين الإثنين.

رابعاً: إن كان لديكم أي ارتباطات بالجامعة الأمريكية في بيروت AUB، الرجاء البحث بما يمكن اجرائه حول مسألة مثل هذه حيث قوبلت صرخات الأم للنجدة بلا مبالاة من أمن الجامعة بل حملوا الضحية مسؤلية الجرم المرتكب بحقها حينما يدفع المال لهذا الفريق للحفاظ على أمن الناس داخل حرم الجامعة. بتمييز عن حالات التحرش المصرح عنها في هذا الموقع، هذه الحديثة حصلت في حرام جامعة، ما يعني أنه بإمكاننا الضغط على ادارتها بإتخاذ قرار بتحسين معالجة أمنها لتلك مسائل.  إن كنتم تلاميذ AUB، عليكم ببدء الشكوى و تضخيم المسألة!

إن كان لديكم أي اسئلة أو تعليقات، و إن اردتم التحدث مع أي عضو منا، الرجاء التواصل معنا هنا.

تضامن

فريق قاومي التحرش

Her child was molested at AUB… and they did nothing to catch the guy!

My daughter was playing with the kitties at AUB between the Agriculture building and the gym. A man of around 30 came up to her and asked her if she wanted to go for a walk with him. She said no but he grabbed her butt while touching his own genitals.

He picked her up and started carrying her to an alcove near the stairway. She struggled and kicked him in his groin and she got away. The man ran away.

AUB was totally unprepared to handle such a situation. As soon as my daughter ran to me in the gym and told me the story of what had happened, I ran out and called from the emergency telephone. But the security person on the other end of the phone could not understand my english well enough and spent 30 minutes trying to get the story right.

In the end he told me that I should not leave my child unattended on campus, at which point i spewed a volcanic erruption of profanity and gave up that they would ever catch the guy. O well.

Submitted by Anonymous

Location: American University of Beirut

Time of harassment:  16-20: Afternoon Rush Hour / العصر

Do you have a personal experience with sexual harassment or assault you would like to share? Please click here and fill out the online submission form. All submissions are posted anonymously unless you specify.

هل لديك تجربة شخصية مع التحرش الجنسي أو الاعتداء تريد مشاركته ؟ الرجاء الضغط هنا وملء استمارة التقديم على الانترنت. وتنشر جميع التقارير مجهول ما لم تحدد

“We yelled, he lurked away… Yelling is not all that satisfying, unfortunately.”

As my friend and I walked to her car, we noticed a man walking up and down the sidewalk near where the car was parked. When we got closer, we realized he was masturbating, with his pants open.

We yelled, he lurked away. We got in the car and left as quickly as possible. Yelling is not all that satisfying, unfortunately.

Submitted by SK

Location: Hamra, between Ain el Mreisseh and Gefinor, on the road that runs up to the Gefinor complex

Time of harassment:  20-2: Night / الليل

Do you have a personal experience with sexual harassment or assault you would like to share? Please click here and fill out the online submission form. All submissions are posted anonymously unless you specify.

هل لديك تجربة شخصية مع التحرش الجنسي أو الاعتداء تريد مشاركته ؟ الرجاء الضغط هنا وملء استمارة التقديم على الانترنت. وتنشر جميع التقارير مجهول ما لم تحدد

Sexually Harassed on a Middle East Airlines flight: “Why were you touching my mother like that?”

I was standing in the aisle of the airplane after landing in beirut when an overweight frenchman bumped up against my back. At first I thought someone had pushed him from behind and that he had stumbled into me.When he continued to lean on me, I said, ‘stop pushing me’ and I sat back down in my seat and he continued to exit the plane.

My 3 kids had witnessed the whole thing and they told me there was noone behind the guy and that he was just rubbing up against me. My youngest daughter of 10 was very mad and wanted to say something to the man. (Coincidentally and unfortunately, she had been touched by a man 2 months ago while playing at AUB.)

At the baggage carousel, she kept asking me, ‘where is he?’. I pointed to the man who was standing with his friend at the other carousel. She asked if she could go say something to him and I said, ‘yes’.

She went straight over to him, and in french said, ‘why were you touching my mother like that?’ The man was embarrassed and said, ‘I didn’t’. My girl repeated the question a number of times. She was very brave and mad. I really respect her for that.

Submitted by Anonymous

Location: On an MEA flight, Beirut Int’l Airport

Time of harassment:  10-16: Daytime / عز النهار

Do you have a personal experience with sexual harassment or assault you would like to share? Please click here and fill out the online submission form. All submissions are posted anonymously unless you specify.

هل لديك تجربة شخصية مع التحرش الجنسي أو الاعتداء تريد مشاركته ؟ الرجاء الضغط هنا وملء استمارة التقديم على الانترنت. وتنشر جميع التقارير مجهول ما لم تحدد

“The same people who are supposed to PROTECT you [the army], are HARASSING you!!”

I was on my way home, after a light evening with some friends in a pub in Beirut.

There was a checkpoint on the karantina bridge, right off mar mkhael area (this became very usual these days). Usually, if you’re a girl, soldiers let you go very easily. This time was different.

The soldier on the checkpoint did a move with his head, signifying: you can go. but in a fraction of second, he changed his mind and asked me to park on the right. I realized my shirt (even if it was more or less decent) might be the cause of this sudden change of mind.

Another soldier on the right asked for my papers, which I gave him. everything seemed fine to him, so he asked me: “why did he (the 1st soldier) asked you to park?”. I had no answer… To my amazement, I see the 1st soldier leaving his checkpoint (yes leaving it), and coming my direction. He stopped by my car and observed me.

2nd soldier: why did u ask her to park?

1st soldier, smiling in connivance : “mashi khayye, I wanted to check if her papers were in order”.

2nd soldier: (smiles). She doesn’t have her mecanique papers (As if I was supposed to have them… he could have looked on the stickers of my front glass!). What shall we do?

1st soldier: (gives me a loooong look, with a dirty smile) yalla let her go!

For the 1st time in my life, I felt completely: amazed, shocked, insulted, naked, and infuriated! The same people who are supposed to PROTECT you, are HARASSING you, directly or indirectly!

Submitted by Anonymous

Location: Karantina, Beirut

Time of harassment:  20-2: Night / الليل

Do you have a personal experience with sexual harassment or assault you would like to share? Please click here and fill out the online submission form. All submissions are posted anonymously unless you specify.

هل لديك تجربة شخصية مع التحرش الجنسي أو الاعتداء تريد مشاركته ؟ الرجاء الضغط هنا وملء استمارة التقديم على الانترنت. وتنشر جميع التقارير مجهول ما لم تحدد

“constantly feel like your body has to cringe while you pass by…”

The daily amount of emotional physical and verbal aggression the average Lebanese woman has to deal with is something that needs to be addressed and punished by law! The constant feeling of having your guards up and defenses at any given time of the day, no matter where you are .

To always be prepared to hear   the most vulgar and offensive words thrown at you so freely and with such arrogance, To constantly feel like your body has to cringe while you pass by…

And if you do decide to defend yourself ,9 times out of ten ,you will hear the answer of : “wlik mashina hal3 ma bida  hal3ad, sabiyeh helweh badna nihke” ahhh!

They have the arrogance to justify it instead of shutting up and putting their heads down where their fat bellies and tiny genitals are!
Why do they do this, because they freaking can and they know they get away with it –
The worst part is, These boys…. think they are men!

Submitted by kissed by a fairy

Location: N/A

Time of harassment: N/A

Do you have a personal experience with sexual harassment or assault you would like to share? Please click here and fill out the online submission form. All submissions are posted anonymously unless you specify.

هل لديك تجربة شخصية مع التحرش الجنسي أو الاعتداء تريد مشاركته ؟ الرجاء الضغط هنا وملء استمارة التقديم على الانترنت. وتنشر جميع التقارير مجهول ما لم تحدد